Groomsmen don’ts

August 27 • 2012

Groomsmen etiquette<br><a href= target=_blank>emilie inc. photography</a>

Groomsmen, we know you’re honored to take part in your buddy’s big day. Your list of to-dos no doubt includes planning the bachelor party, standing next to your friend at the ceremony, and maybe delivering a toast.

But do you also know what you’re NOT supposed to do? We don’t mean the obvious (i.e. hitting on the bride and swiping cash gifts) because we know you’re better than that. We’re talking about matters of decorum that will prevent you from becoming that guy everyone’s whispering about during the reception. In a bad way.

Just to be on the safe side, we’ll spell it out:

Don’t get drunk before the ceremony. This also includes the implied “Don’t get the groom drunk before the ceremony.” Sure, enjoy a beer or a few sips of whiskey to calm the nerves or to celebrate as you get dressed. But showing up to this momentous event with a buzz on is disrespectful, and will be noticed. The groom won’t thank you later if he has no memory of exchanging vows because you pressured him into tossing back a few Irish car bombs.

Don’t arrive unprepared to dress up. If we hadn’t seen a groomsman take his shirt out of the plastic package a mere moments before game time, we’d think this goes without saying. Make sure your clothing is ironed and presentable the night before. Learn how to fold that pocket square and tie your bowtie. Wear matching socks.

Don’t wear sunglasses. Yes, even if it’s a bright, sunny day. They look tacky in wedding photos, there are just no two ways about it. You can put those Ray Bans or Oakleys back on after the ceremony and portrait session. But please, don’t go all Corey Feldman and don them all night.

Don’t mention an ex during your toast. As in the groom’s, but probably not your own either. Plenty of brides will gamely smile their way through this faux pas, but others won’t, so save everyone the awkwardness and don’t bring her up at all. Your pal’s wedding day is about looking forward to the future, not dwelling in the past.

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