Love and Lobster Coastal New England Weddings

Surely you’d be flattered to hear your guests ooh and ahh in admiration over your wedding gown as you walk down the aisle. But imagine if cousin Julia sidled up as you cut the cake and ripped off a handful of tulle to snag as a keepsake.

For brides marrying back in the 14^th century, such acts of dress defacement were par for the course, as guests believed snatching a piece of the gown would bestow on them similar good fortune. But early brides’ frustration at being manhandled spawned one of our most venerable wedding traditions – the bouquet toss.

Brides initially started throwing their stockings or garters to fend off the throngs , but then opted for more dignified bouquets of flowers (drunk and eager bachelors who grabbed for the garter themselves were largely to blame). Those brides of yore would no doubt be shocked to see the custom surviving centuries later, sometimes provoking an entirely different kind of mob scene to the tune of Beyonce’s “Single Ladies.”

That’s not to say the bouquet toss, believed to bring the recipient luck in love, hasn’t seen some changes over the years. While it’s customary to involve only unmarried female guests in the tradition, couples today sometimes ask all of the women, regardless of marital status, to participate, or present the bouquet to a newly engaged woman. Others offer the flowers to a wedded couple or guest whose own marriage has inspired their union.

Many modern brides and grooms also forgo the bouquet toss entirely. But for those who do want to incorporate a flower fling, it never hurts to know the tradition’s origins. Turns out there’s historical significance to the phrase “Don’t mess with the dress.”